As Nicole sat there in her room, reminiscing on her loving relationship with her grandmother, she couldn't help but cherish the teddy bear that she was holding so tightly in her arms. Holding her teddy bear made Nicole feel like her grandmother was still with her. Her teddy bear was about a foot high, four inches wide, with milk chocolate fluffy fur, and big brown eyes. Nicole named her Brownie, because of her milk chocolate fur. Brownie was a huge priority in Nicole’s life. She would groom her fur, sleep with her, eat with her, hell sometimes she would even bathe with her. Nicole literally treated Brownie like she was her very own child by giving her as much love as possible. Throughout all the horrific life experiences Nicole went through, Brownie was always there to comfort her. Nicole promised herself and her grandmother that she will protect, love, and adore Brownie for as long as she lived.

     Nicole’s grandmother had a stroke at the age of 57, just a few days after Nicole turned 15. Her grandmother spent almost an entire year in the hospital, before Nicole finally got the courage to visit her. Walking into her grandmother’s hospital room for the first time, Nicole couldn’t believe what she saw. The entire right side of her body was paralyzed. Her face was drooping, she was not able to speak, and her legs was amputated. Nicole broke down in tears and disbelief. She was trying to understand why God was taking the one person she loved and cherished most away from her. But Nicole knew she had to be strong for her grandmother and try to look to the brighter side of the situation. While there were tears rushing down her face, she noticed her grandmother using her only available arm to reach for a handwritten note that was on the table and a teddy bear. Her grandmother looked Nicole straight into her eyes and placed both items into her hands.  Nicole looked at the note, written in her grandmother’s handwriting, and it read: “Nicole, you and I both know that I might not make it. After everything you have been through, I know you can overcome any and everything. I want you to know that I love you and I will always be there with and for you”.  Nicole couldn’t help but cry inconsolably again, feeling her heart being broken into a million pieces. Just when Nicole was trying to pull herself together, her grandmother immediately reached up, touched Nicole’s chest (heart), stroked her hair and closed her eyes. Nicole said “Grandma everything is going to be okay, your doctor said you’re going to be able to come home next week.”

     As young kid, Nicole’s life was incredibly grim. It was like the Titanic, it was gliding along peacefully with a PROMISING FUTURE, until it hit an iceberg of RESPONSIBILITIES and began to sink in the Atlantic Ocean of ADULTHOOD. Both of her parents neglected her. Her father abandoned her and her mother built a tremendous amount of immaturity, which lead to Nicole being responsible for her younger siblings. There were many days when Nicole couldn’t go to school because she had to make sure her siblings were going to school, and she had to clean and feed her newborn sister and her 2 year old sister because her mother didn’t care. Nicole lived in a very dysfunctional home. Although, Nicole loved her mother and siblings very much, she knew she had to leave for the sake of her own future, which culminated her going to live with her grandmother. Nicole and her grandmother knew they were meant to be together. Nicole meant the world to her grandmother and her grandmother meant everything to her. She felt her life was finally changing for the better, but that feeling only lasted for a year.